Benefits of getting old - MyTractorForum.com - The Friendliest Tractor Forum and Best Place for Tractor Information

jeepersmitty · 04-02-2009, 10:47 PM

Benefits of getting old

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2 . In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run -- anywhere.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, 'Did I wake you?'
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat supper at 4 PM.
9. You can live 'without sex but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15 . Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national
weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
18. Your supply of braincells is finally down to a manageable size.
19. You can't remember who sent you this list.
And you notice these are all in big print for your convenience.

ONE MORE THING:
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on the same night!

Jim_WV · 04-02-2009, 10:50 PM

I don't know whether I'd call them benefits, but they are defintley true

440roadrunner · 04-03-2009, 03:48 AM

A friend of mine once wryly observed that "we" would be better off if we could keep our teeth instead of our nuts

Carl · 04-03-2009, 06:51 AM

Changing a name is wonderful. I used to feel bad because of all my troubles. But now that I call them benefits - - I'm great!

Thanks for the post

Team_Green · 04-03-2009, 08:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 440roadrunner

A friend of mine once wryly observed that "we" would be better off if we could keep our teeth instead of our nuts

That right there is funny stuff...

APinNY · 04-03-2009, 12:17 PM

"Getting old" is making mistakes, catching them and cursing yourself out.

"Being old" is making mistakes and not catching them.

Walt 2002 · 04-03-2009, 04:22 PM

Got tee off the other day when local newspaper said "Elderly man involved in accident", he was 65, heck just a kid.

Walt Conner

04-02-2009, 10:47 PM	#1
jeepersmitty Retired Aug.31 2007 Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Mineola, Texas Posts: 7,473 MTF Member # 6130 Images: 2	Benefits of getting old Benefits of getting old 1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 2 . In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first. 3. No one expects you to run -- anywhere. 4. People call at 9 PM and ask, 'Did I wake you?' 5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac. 6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way. 7. Things you buy now won't wear out. 8. You can eat supper at 4 PM. 9. You can live 'without sex but not your glasses. 10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans. 11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge. 12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room. 13. You sing along with elevator music. 14. Your eyes won't get much worse. 15 . Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off. 16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service. 17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either. 18. Your supply of braincells is finally down to a manageable size. 19. You can't remember who sent you this list. And you notice these are all in big print for your convenience. ONE MORE THING: Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on the same night! __________________ I always know... God won't give me more than I can handle There are times I just wish He didn't trust me quite so much.

04-02-2009, 10:50 PM	#2
Jim_WV Senior MTF Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: West Virginia Posts: 16,145 MTF Member # 241 Images: 14	Re: Benefits of getting old I don't know whether I'd call them benefits, but they are defintley true

04-03-2009, 03:48 AM	#3
440roadrunner Senior MTF Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Idaho Posts: 653 MTF Member # 20749	Re: Benefits of getting old A friend of mine once wryly observed that "we" would be better off if we could keep our teeth instead of our nuts

04-03-2009, 06:51 AM	#4
Carl 3K Poster!!!! Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: se Michigan Posts: 3,803 MTF Member # 249 Images: 1	Re: Benefits of getting old Changing a name is wonderful. I used to feel bad because of all my troubles. But now that I call them benefits - - I'm great! Thanks for the post __________________ Believe

04-03-2009, 12:17 PM	#6
APinNY Senior MTF Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Upstate NY Posts: 955 MTF Member # 22011 Images: 4	Re: Benefits of getting old "Getting old" is making mistakes, catching them and cursing yourself out. "Being old" is making mistakes and not catching them. __________________ Al Kubota BX1860, 48" mulching MMM, FEL, snow thrower, cab TroyBilt LTX 15.5, snow thrower, cab (sold) Craftsman DYT 4000 Special Edition, 21 HP Briggs Twin (sold) DR Lawn Vac (great machine for tons of leaves) 1978 Craftsman 7 1/2 HP snow blower (backup machine) "Save your life. Let a tractor do it!" 9th Infantry Division, Vietnam 1968-69

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04-03-2009, 04:22 PM	#7
Walt 2002 Senior MTF Poster Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: IL Posts: 2,810 MTF Member # 1229	Re: Benefits of getting old Got tee off the other day when local newspaper said "Elderly man involved in accident", he was 65, heck just a kid. Walt Conner

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